On the way.

I don’t know when I stopped counting down the days in a year. It used to be a habit I started with the intent of making me more conscious and aware of time.

At that time, I felt like I was really chasing after something. Keeping track of my goals every day amidst anxiety, hope and extremely bourgeoisie dreams. It hit me the other day that I got drowned in working hard that I forgot that I initially had an end goal.

When you end up working so hard you lose track and forget your goals… Just working. Sometimes, if you’re lucky, you’ll get a moment of lucidity that prompts you to realize you got a little distracted on your goals. It’s great, because it will force you to sort of restart your system and get back on track.

Remember, the work is a stepping stone but it is not the end goal.

So you take a step back, take a deep breath and empty your mind. The world sort of goes quiet in those moments. And you get to watch your life from a few steps back and think, hey. I’m proud of you kiddo.

That lucid feeling descended on me on Thursday. I looked up to the sky and saw the thin crescent moon at around 4.30 pm marking The Islamic New Year, 1439. A new moon. A new year. It just seemed very special and magical in that moment.

I can’t describe what happened next but I felt the hairs raise on the back of my neck and arms, and the entire world went completely silent. And there I was – just staring at the Alzu Petroport view point.

There’s this pool where wildlife come to graze – I remember seeing zebras and buffaloes. It’s almost as if that moment overcame all my senses that I couldn’t really digest all that was before me. Like, I was in a dream.

We got only five minutes to take pictures then we were back on the road. It was a long ride, from Nelspruit to Sandton, and I’m grateful I got to see the sunset. The sun sets quite early around here – a huge ball of fire in the sky from around 5.30 – 6 pm. It’s magnificent.

Oh, and today is the 268th day of 2017. 268/ 365.

97 days remaining in 2017.

I need to do more memorable things.

Resilience.

Isn’t it intriguing how language can have such a great effect on us?

And how our minds can process certain emotions in pictures and interpret what we see for us, on an emotional level.

This photo somehow made me think of the word ‘Resilience’. She, along with four other ladies, were cooking in this room that didn’t have a roof. It’s was just so interesting to experience it with them. So familiar. The feeling of women talking, mothers. It made me miss my mum in that moment.

I’m pretty sure you interpret it differently too. But when I explain myself, you get it. Right?

At different junctures in my persona, I find myself gravitating towards certain words.

Recently it’s been resilience.

Resilience.

At times it’s joy. Love. Strength. Beauty. Intellect. Class.

I repeat these words to myself as reminders – affirmations – whenever I get a moment of presence. They seem to be distant these days so whenever I do get one, I hold onto it as long as I can.

I enjoy the walks home from the bus stop. How the trees look when they catch the security light in their leaves.

I’ve noticed they’ve been blooming a bit more. There’s this scanty bush that has these fragrant little white flowers that fill up the entire area with a sweet, soft scent of a million flowers.

Like perfume.

Yesterday I picked one and put it in my hair.

Tonight, I’m exhausted. But extremely grateful. I want to push harder. I want to be better.

I want to be great.

the granary bread

“Every morning was a cheerful invitation to make my life of equal simplicity, and I may say innocence, with Nature herself.” ― Henry David Thoreau.

 

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Last Saturday, I had an early bird breakfast with my friend Joyce at Le Grenier à Pain, a chic French restaurant up along Riverside Drive. We got there around 8.35 am, the weather being nice and brisk. The cool, clean morning air settling deliciously on our skin. I love early mornings when they start off slow, or rather, tame. When you can enjoy the quiet while everybody else is still asleep or just waking up. Considering it being a Saturday morning, people started strolling in around 10 to 11 when Joyce and I had already settled in and relaxed. We spent our entire time talking about our dreams, set some goals and enjoyed some great food.

I had the marinated smoked salmon with cream cheese, scrambled eggs, capers and shaved red onions, and Joyce had the apple cinnamon French toast with fresh fruits, crème fraîche & maple syrup. We got a basket of fresh bread and butter for good measure and every single thing was divine. Later on we shared the raspberry tart as dessert. The decor was a dream to photograph, and I happily snapped away practising some tips I picked up from tutorials I’ve been watching on YouTube Academy.

You should pass by one of these fine mornings.

P. S. You may find Joyce on social media as Podoa by Joy. She’s a fantastic makeup artist 🙂